Thursday, February 01, 2007


The following is a list of words I have come across a lot lately and have had quite enough of. This is just installment one because I want to break it up into categories as not to overwhelm. Installment one deals with vocabulary relating to children. Now, its no secret that I don't really LIKE children (I think they're cute from a far. From VERY a far) so, perhaps I'm biased, but I know that I'm not alone in a few of these...even among those who have spawn of their own.

Baby Bump - Seriously? Could we PLEASE stop hearing this word? The celeb "Bump Watch" is making me want to vomit. (Sometimes...people just have a pooch there in the lower abdomen area! It doesn't mean your preggers, cause if it did, I've been pregs for 20 years now.)

Playdate - What happened to just "we met up and our kids happened to be there" OR "our kids met up to play" OR JUST "We got together"? Why the special word? It just adds to the many words/phrases that make parents seem like they lost all normal word function once their egg hatched.

Mommy Wars - No one is EVER going to come to a consensus on who's a bad mother/good mother based on breast feeding vs. formula, working vs. staying home, etc etc etc, so lets stop with the "mommy wars." Look, if you don't lock your kids up in the basement and systematically torture them- you're doing all right. Do you feed them something? Ok then. (And could we find a less irritating phrase than "mommy wars"? No one over the age of 7 should be using the word "mommy.")

And lastly, a phrase used often within "mommy war" diatribe:

Breast is Best - It rhymes. One of the words is breast. Another of the words rhymes with breast. The only other word involved is "is". Enough said.

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