Monday, January 22, 2007


Has this ever happened to you?

You enter a bathroom, prepare to do your bidness, and go to take a seat. Then, due to the fact that the particular toilet you’re using is shorter than the one you are accustomed to, you experience momentary panic on the way down- right at the level where your usual toilet would be located. The following quickly runs through your mind:

“Oh shit…I’m going down…did I sit too far to the right? AM I MISSING THE TOILET COMPLETELY? Am I about to fall-bare ass first-on the dirty bathroom floor?!?! CAN I NOT EVEN BE TRUSTED WITH THE SIMPLE TASK OF TAKING A LEAK?!?!"

Only to have a wave of relief wash over you when PLUNK, you hit the toilet seat and not the floor and realize that this toilet must just be lower than the one you’re used to. Phew.

What’s that? You say that’s never happened to you?


Well…uh… mind. Me either. I was just thinking that it COULD happen...and this would probably be what it would be like if it did...uh...happen.

1 comment:

Noelle said...

Uh... Yeah, I've done that. I just thank my lucky stars that I date a man who puts the seat down (if you ever find a guy with 3 older sisters, let me tell you, snatch him up!) Because I've been the victim of sitting on seatless toilets, and it is so completely uncool.