POTTY PERILS AND TOLIET TERROR
Has this ever happened to you?
You enter a bathroom, prepare to do your bidness, and go to take a seat. Then, due to the fact that the particular toilet you’re using is shorter than the one you are accustomed to, you experience momentary panic on the way down- right at the level where your usual toilet would be located. The following quickly runs through your mind:
“Oh shit…I’m going down…did I sit too far to the right? AM I MISSING THE TOILET COMPLETELY? Am I about to fall-bare ass first-on the dirty bathroom floor?!?! CAN I NOT EVEN BE TRUSTED WITH THE SIMPLE TASK OF TAKING A LEAK?!?!"
Only to have a wave of relief wash over you when PLUNK, you hit the toilet seat and not the floor and realize that this toilet must just be lower than the one you’re used to. Phew.
What’s that? You say that’s never happened to you?
Well…uh…yeah...um...never mind. Me either. I was just thinking that it COULD happen...and this would probably be what it would be like if it did...uh...happen.